Wednesday, April 20, 2005

You know that saying...

Things get worse before they get better? I sure hope it's true.

I have had one hell of a semester, and thank God it is almost over. The group project is a fiasco. It has turned into mutiny. Now I have to defend myself before the prof so that she doesn't fail me. Things are about to get dirty, because if I fail...everybody is failing. Nurse Diva in full effect. I am really disappointed in my teammates and former so-called friends. I guess I am also a little surprised that they turned against me. But hey, I'm not perfect and neither are they. I am taking no prisoners. Everybody's going down.

Clinical was a little better yesterday. It's amazing, one day everybody is mean to each other, the five minutes later or even next day they are best friends. I think that nurses as a whole are bipolar. I don't really know if I am cut out for this. I am a person who is compassionate and thoughtful. I think that giving a person a cool drink of water or holding their hand is a simple gesture of care. If I care for you, I will give you the best I have to offer. I don't have to be your best friend to do it, I do it because it's who I am. You don't have to ask, if I see that you need something I just jump in and try to help, instinctively. I don't want any noteriety, I do things because I can. I wish I could be different, because when people let me down, I feel so hurt.

Despite my recent disappointment, I believe that I will rise above adversity. The rose that blooms in the midst of adversity is the most beautiful of all.

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