I hate feeling like this. One day I am thinking, okay I have a handle on this job and the next day I am a complete moron. It is becoming more than I can bear. Even as a DiVa!
The past week, everything I try to do well ends up being a fiasco. I had a patient who was having all these late decelerations. On a fetal tracing, a late deceleration is when the baby's heart rate takes a dip right after the peak of a contraction. Lates are not usually a good thing as they are indicative of cord compression. If the umbilical cord is compressed the baby is not getting much oxygen. IF this low oxygen state persists, the baby can become acidotic and generally a speedy deliver, usually a c-section is indicated.
In my first bad delivery, the patient was having these late decelerations and we began to push because at this time she was completely dilated and effaced. The baby came out with the umbilical cord wrapped around his neck twice, tight. The cord could not be reduced it was so tight. The MD clamped and cut the cord and I tried to stimulate the baby to breathe on the Mom's chest. That didn't work. So I too the baby over to the warmer. I had my warmer set up and someone messed with the suction. It wasn't working. My baby was not breathing. So I checked the heartrate. I was over 100 which is great.
So I used the bulb syringe and continued to suction and stimulate. I wasn't even thinking about the code button. The OB attending asked me if I needed her to get me some help and I said PLEASE! So the two snobbiest, bitchiest nurses on our shift came into my room. They asked me what I was doing and I told them and they said "Why don't you just go take care of the Mom. We've got this." They were so nasty. It really hurt my feelings. I decided not to say anything because I know that I am the unit moron. These people always have a way of putting me in my new grad, don't know nothing about nothing place. I wonder if they came onto the floor knowing everything there is to know about being a nurse.
Then a day or two later, I had a mom with twins. She was over 40 weeks which is amazing for twins. Everything started off well. I was working with another inexperienced nurse and she was questioning everything she asked me to help her with like I didn't know what I was talking about. And she was double checking my answers with two other new nurses. Amazing! I should have stopped helping her but as I see it, nursing is a team sport, and there is no "I" in team. But besides that, I am trying to be the type of nurse that is helpful and not hurtful. Whatever. My twins had started having late decelerations. I had been calling all night because the tracing had begun to look a bit questionable. However, it didn't stop the MDs from calling me and asking me to increase the pitocin.
Anyway, I had been turning her and gave her some oxygen. I called overhead after two really moderate lates and the charge nurse comes over to ask me what I am doing. I was reviewing the tracing with the doctor, but I guess that wasn't good enough. I went into the room and turned the patient I gave her some oxygen, gave her a bolus of maintenance fluid, turned off the pitocin and looked for a change in the tracing. In the meantime, another nurse came in with the anesthesiologist. She was yelling at him that her blood pressure was too low. It wasn't too low. As a matter of fact the blood pressure wasn't very different from her baseline. The MD wanted to place a fetal scalp electrode. I had my monitor parts. By this time my room was full of people. The family was freaking out. Then the two evil nurses from my other delivery come in and start whispering. I am about ready to cuss, but being the DiVa I am, I stayed cool. The heartrate looked good, the babies were on the monitor and one by one the intervention was being to dissolve. Normalcy returns. And I am back at the monitor, charting and watching my tracing.
At this point I am mad as hell. I am about ready to quit this job. I am trying so hard to be part of the group. They had a party and I made something to share. No one ate it. I guess that's okay because I brought it back home and it was gone by the afternoon. But at the same time, It hurt my feelings. I talked to the nurse manager and she asked that I hang in there and just wait to see how much I really know. I don't know if I can. I have already started putting in applications at other hospitals.
DiVa...Using the nursing shortage to her advantage. I don't have to feel uncomfortable anywhere, Bitches!